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Last July, Forbe’s Magazine published an article by Steve Cooper (@hitchedmedia) on Why Wrestlers Make the Best Employees. I giggled and thought, here we go again. You see, wrestlers (at least the ones I know) sometimes think of themselves in a class of their own. From my experience, wrestlers typically think they work harder than most, if not all, other athletes. [I worked hard as a college athlete. I work hard now.] I suppose it was my own ego kicking in when these first thoughts entered my mind. However, when I let my own issues settle, I smile. In fact, I count myself extremely lucky to have married a wrestler - they have earned the right (generally speaking, of course) to think highly of their efforts. Thus, in the spirit of February 14th, here is my attempt at a sequel to Mr. Cooper’s article.
Why wrestlers make the best partners.
I married the second wrestler I ever met. I’m from Canada. The only other wrestler I ever met is my younger cousin TJ (UFC Fighter, TJ Grant). In the land of hockey, you don’t often meet wrestlers - at least on the east coast. While it is growing at incredible rates throughout the country (as of lately), it wasn’t when I was growing up. I moved to the US to teach and coach (soccer). Later, I attended graduate school at the University of Virginia. It is here, where I first met my now husband.
Our first “date” was a trip to the Maury River, VA - white water kayaking? Fortunately, I’m still here to tell about it. I never saw cauliflower ears before this day. I was certain Jim (my partner in crime) was born with his cauliflower ears. Little did I know that these two ears would be the conversation starter every single time we would be in an airport together [wrestlers tend to flock to other wrestlers]. At the time we met, Jim was the assistant wrestling coach at UVA - although, he was in the process of resigning. While Jim loved coaching, remained very curious about research and was going back to graduate school in engineering. Wrestlers are focused.
Jim never won high school state and was admitted into a pretty good school – Cornell – on his academic achievements. He worked hard, and later in his career he placed 7th at nationals to make All-American status. I’m told by some of his former teammates that without his work ethic, this never would have happened. Wrestlers work extremely hard.
Meeting Jim’s former teammates and coaches was nothing short of scary. While they seemed nice enough, I know that they were evaluating my worthiness. “Vetted” might be a better term. I can say now that I would love to have a child wrestle for someone with the character of Coach Rob Koll, but at first - I was just intimidated. Wrestlers are loyal.
- Jim’s All American plaque that sits underneath our bed.
Jim never shares his accolades unless they are directly solicited. In fact, his All-American plaque remains under our bed. I dug it out to share a pic...
When questioned by family of its location and why it’s not on display, Jim quietly mentions it’s not that big of a deal. I know – because he has told me – that he really thinks about: a teammate (a dear friend) who lost in the All-American round by one point; or the teammate (another dear friend) who almost placed as a junior and then went on to miss nationals as a senior because of poor timing with the onset of viral pink eye; or even worse, the teammate who passed away during training. As a group, they can be very vocal in all they did (e.g., cutting weight, two-three a day workouts) and perhaps this is most likely do (in my opinion) to cutbacks in their sport at many colleges as it doesn’t bring in the coin like some other sports. Yet, their experiences competing, winning, and losing on center stage impacts them deeply, and keeps them grounded. Wrestlers are humble.
Tips for marrying a wrestler.
All the reasons that one should love a wrestler, should also be considered when deciding to live your life with one. In my humble opinion, it takes a certain breed to be happy married to a wrestler.
They are going to work long hours. It doesn’t matter what they do for a living. The time they put into studying, drilling and cutting extra weight is embedded in them. So, you best be an independent person who has a lot going on for yourself if you expect to be content. I’m not saying other people don’t work long hours. I’m not saying wrestlers work longer hours than your partner. I have a sample size of one, and my research background tells me that the external validity of my experience is null. (Side note: I’m going keep this sample size at one - thank you very much.)
They are not going to say no to employees, co-workers, or past teammates. They will say no to you. They will expect a lot from you as they expect from themselves. But, they will go through brick walls for you whenever it comes time to do so. Be prepared to be flexible, as plans will change. Yet, understand why they are changing and where the intent is coming from – it’s not to hurt you. Just as they wanted to help their team’s standing at nationals, they want to continue to serve others as much as possible. While it can be annoying, one can’t help but admire their commitment to leaving the world a better place.
They will stick with a task until it’s complete. Whether a leaky faucet, a math problem in grad school, or organizing the garage - wrestlers will not quit until the job is done. It doesn’t matter if it’s dinnertime, kids’ bath time, or time to catch a flight. Consider yourself warned.
They don’t like complaining. They get to work, and will expect you to do the same. One date we ended up at the summit of White Face Mountain. I thought people usually trained for that sort of thing, but apparently if you see a mountain, and you want to climb it, you do so. When I “mentioned” perhaps we should turn back as dark clouds were coming, I was reminded that we would miss the epic view. Alas, foreshadowing at its finest. Lucky, lucky me.
Mr. Cooper was right. All things equal, I would totally hire a wrestler. I’ve never regretted my decision to marry one either. Jim and I have been together since that first date nine years ago - and married six and a half. I have had the privilege to see each layer of his loyalty, work ethic, and commitment to his family and friends. [I particularly appreciate his ability to go without food if needed - it takes a lot of pressure off having to have meals prepared by a particular time.]
These days, my former wrestler enjoys wrestling with our two little girls.
Add on
I wrote this article as a Valentines’ gift to my husband - the night before the IOC’s announcement to eliminate the sport of wrestling in 2020 was released. To cut an original sport of the Olympic Games – one that fosters equality for men and women at the Olympic level – and that fosters physical fitness as much as wrestling does - is really sad.
Wrestling is a sport that brings together people all over the world in the way the Olympic Spirit is intended.
Wrestling champions aren’t born. Wrestling is a lifestyle and champions are made through a years of a lifestyle that doesn’t include luxury. Rather, it is a lifestyle with a level of focus, commitment and dedication that is unwavering.
Wrestling is everything to so many young athletes around the world, and doesn’t cost families thousands of dollars a year to participate in.
What other sport can an individual with one leg - or no legs - compete against opponents with two legs? Wrestling is as inclusive as a sport as they come - there is a singlet/weight class for every size.
Some sports have championships (Stanley Cup, anyone?) but wrestling - still so pure - has the Olympics. To take it away is stripping a dream from so many kids.
As a physical education and sport professional, to eliminate a sport that is equitable for all youth in this world, is really tragic. Yes. Tragic. I thoroughly enjoy writing leadership programs for youth wrestling because the persistence that the athletes demonstrates provides a beautiful platform to connect to life lessons. It prepares them to be better citizens.
But, I’m new to the wrestling world. If you really want a beautiful description of how it impacts people around the globe, check this out (written by a good friend, an All-American wrestler, and former athlete that Jim coached at UVA).
http://www.intermatwrestle.com/articles/11398
Thus, it’s a sad week in the wrestling community.
Soooooo - let’s show ‘em some love:
If you would like to sign a petition – on behalf of all those girls and boys with dreams of representing their country in the Olympics in the sport of wrestling - please visit:
